USA Today/Ipsos released a poll recently offering two definitions of “woke.” In the poll 56% chose the definition of “to be informed, educated on, and aware of social injustices and 39% picked “to be overly politically correct and police others’ words.” The first definition is correct. The term originated in the Black community as a reference to social injustice. 

The City of Asheville and Buncombe County, NC are working on becoming “woke,” by having formed a reparations commission to explore reparations in five key areas that impact POC (people of color) and their history including:

– health – average white male will live 5 years longer than a POC male; POC infant mortality is 2.5X greater than white

– education – only 57% of POC students have access to a full range of math and science courses necessary for college readiness

– justice – while POC makes up about 13% of our population, POC dominate our jails and prisons

– housing –  POC post a homeownership rate of 46% compared to 76% of white families

– economic – an average white family is 10X wealthier than the average POC family

There are very few communities in America doing this extensive work and study on reparations. Recommend reading From Here to Equality.

This conversation and study on reparations begins with learning and understanding the history of POC in this country and in this community. Knowing the history will help you to understand the inequalities listed above in the five areas of the reparation study. 

One of the first things an oppressor does is remove the history of its victims. I know I can trace my family history back to Scotland and Ireland for over 400 years. Most POC are lucky if they can go back 150 years.

Confederate monuments are a part of this history. If you have the courage, have a conversation with POC about Jim Crow-era monuments and their impact on them. To do a deeper dive, consider joining Building Bridges, attending an REI retreat, and/or becoming a part of CTTT.

The Vance Monument and three other monuments here in Asheville were a part of over 1,700 Confederate monuments erected during the Jim Crow era. Those monuments as well as 10 military bases, numerous streets, buildings, and schools were named after Confederates.

Those monuments are part of the caste system enacted in this country to control, dominate, and oppress POC. There have been three caste systems enacted in the world – India, the United States, and Nazi Germany. The German Nazis learned how to enact their caste system back in the 30s from the United States. They sent people from Germany to study Jim Crow tactics, and the United States sent people to Nazi Germany to help them control the Jews, gays, gypsies, and other ‘deplorables’. If you want to be “woke” to this, recommend reading Isabel Wilkerson’s Caste: The Origins of Our Discontents. This was the non-fiction book of the year in 2020. Recently, Krista Tippett interviewed Wilkerson on this topic.

Robert E. Lee was a traitor to his commission and the oath he took to serve in the U.S. Army. More U.S. Army soldiers died under Lee than any other enemy our armed forces have ever faced in American history. Why do we honor Lee, Vance, and so many others for their traitorous actions? Does Germany have monuments to Hitler and other Nazi leaders? Again, if you want to be “woke” to this history, suggest reading U.S. Army General (retired) Ty Siedule’s Robert E. Lee and Me. Here is a link to Ty Seidule being interviewed on CBS about his book.

Beginning with cotton, tobacco, sugar, rice, and the building of railroads, where are the monuments to POC on whose backs this country’s wealth was built? The Asheville community owes its growth to the enslaved building the railroads that led to Asheville back in the 1800s. Where is the monument to their work?

I haven’t covered what our forefathers did to the indigenous people of this country, the Japanese-Americans during WWII, or any other group of people who do not look white. That’s another topic!

Where are you now with being ‘woke’?

Whenever I facilitate a retreat, a workshop, or a program, I take along books that are relevant to the topic(s) and put them on a table in the room.

I would refer to key New York Times best-seller books, asking if participants were familiar with such an author or book. Much of the time, I’d get deer-in-the-headlight looks. I stopped asking.

I came across this piece by Thomas Chatterton Williams in the Atlantic. It speaks to what I have experienced. It is why I challenge people about opinions. Tell me the basis of your opinion and its foundation. 

“We have never before had access to so many perspectives, ideas, and information. Much of it is fleetingly interesting but ultimately inconsequential—not to be confused with expertise, let alone wisdom. This much is widely understood and discussed. The ease with which we can know things and communicate them to one another, as well as launder success in one realm into pseudo-authority in countless others, has combined with a traditional American tendency toward anti-intellectualism and celebrity worship. Toss in a decades-long decline in the humanities, and we get our superficial culture in which even the elite will openly disparage as pointless our main repositories for the very best that has been thought.”

I grew up in a home of readers. There was always a book or two on my father’s nightstand as he read every night. One of my mother’s favorite ways to relax was to pour a cup of coffee, light up a cigarette and read a book. (She quit smoking in 1969.) We went to the library a couple of times a month. Today, part of my lifestyle is to read a book for one hour per day…and I still have time for 4+ hours of screen time on my iPhone, computer, and TV as well as to eat, exercise, complete “to-dos,” and work.

“I submit that we’d save ourselves an enormous amount of trouble in the future if we’d agree to a simple litmus test: Immediately disregard anyone in the business of selling a vision who proudly proclaims they hate reading.

Agreed.

Consider reading Annie Dukes, Quit: The Power of Knowing When To Walk Away. Dukes, a former professional poker player, learned the secret to winning at poker was knowing when to quit. It turns out, it takes grit to quit! As a rule, most of us are terrible quitters! Dukes helps the reader to learn to quit in order to be successful in life.

I will be facilitating a book discussion on Quit this spring. If you want to learn more and sign up, email me at carrpe.diem@gmail.com

Recently I was invited by More Fearless Change authors, MaryLynn Manns and Linda Rising, to be a part of a virtual Fearless Change Campfire. I was asked to share a personal story about personal fearless change. Reading their book, I recognized several patterns of implementing change in my life.

My story began after I graduated from college with a major in psychology. I was trying to decide what my next move would be, including going on to get a master’s degree in psychology.

My father left the corporate world to go into business for himself. He purchased a Jan/San distribution business back in the ’60s. He had a sales territory that needed a rep and asked me if I’d like to take the position. I took the position and earned my “master’s degree” in cleaning, learning how to run a profitable business and manage twelve employees! More than that, I learned a lot about my father and leadership. He became a mentor (one of the practices of More Fearless Change). One of my favorite events was meeting my father for lunch to discuss business life.

I loved working with him. We became business partners with a yin and yang way to lead and manage the business. On Sunday, March 13, 1988, we both heard a sermon based upon the V-formation and its connection to creating a loving, nurturing community. I was intrigued by this message and went to the library to check out a book on this Canada goose behavior. On St. Patrick’s Day, March 17, 1988, I shared this information with my father and told him that I thought we had a V-formation with our staff in our business. That was the last conversation I had with my father. He died that night of a massive heart attack.

Easter came on April 3rd and I was deep in the grief of my father’s death and very angry with God. I would have nothing to do with showing up at church in my Sunday best. I did wake up early on that Easter morning and walked down from our home to the Miami River in Dayton, OH, to attend an Easter sunrise service. As I got close to the river, I heard loud honking overhead. I looked up and saw an incredibly large V-formation!

I was speechless, teary-eyed, and humbled. I simply looked up to the heavens and said the greatest prayer of all, “Thank You!” I had just experienced the practices of The Right Time and Emotional Connection leading to the practice of a Time for Reflection, chapters in More Fearless Change.

I took over the principal leadership role in our business. That led me to the More Fearless Change practice of Go-To-Person. I created a board of advisors who challenged me on where and how I was going to lead the business. It also created the More Fearless Change practice of Know-Yourself and Wake-Up Call.

While I loved working with my father in our business, I recognized this was not the purpose of my life. I felt the call to organizational and leadership development. I left the Jan/San business to become the Venture Out! Director at Camp Joy in Clarksville, OH. This work was transformative and rewarding, feeding my gifts, talents, and passions.

My father’s death was a gift. It lead me to helping individuals and organizations learn, live, and promote “seizing the day,” leading to reduced ignorance and suffering and enhanced living.

“We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.”                                                                                                                      – Joseph Campbell, The Hero’s Journey

Question: Have you had a “death” experience, literally or figuratively that led to your rebirth?

We live in a time of darkness. That darkness is rooted in evil. The darkness seems overwhelming and feeds fear and breeds distrust.

Besides the epidemics of opioids and COVID, we are also experiencing the epidemics of un-democracy, denial, ignorance, and assault weapons – all are rooted in darkness and fed by fear and distrust. The desire to overcome this darkness is thwarted by Einstein’s definition of insanity – “doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.”

On April 22, 1999, I flew out to Littleton, CO for business. Not far from my business dealing was the scene of, at that time, the deadliest high school shooting in U.S. history at Columbine, H.S. The whole Denver area was a sea of grief and disbelief that this mass killing could come to be. Like the recent Uvalde, TX mass killing, police were criticized for their response. That mass killing lead to rapid action deployment against active shooters. School security increased dramatically nationwide. Conversations focused on parenting and violence in video games and movies. Debates began on gun laws, gun control, gun locks, gun owner background checks, and better-policing methods. Editorials spoke of making efforts to get a grip on this violence growing in our country.

Here we are 23 years later with no change, just more “thoughts and prayers for the victims and their families.” Since Columbine, over 311,000 children at 311 schools have been exposed to gun violence at their schools. We have failed to learn that “thoughts and prayers” are useless to dead children and the families left in grief. We are numb from the heartache. For those of us practicing Christianity and asking WWJD, we continue life as spiritual zombies. Commonsensical, holistic, modest, minimally coercive measures still have not gained traction. The secular gun lobby and the second amendment still hold us hostage to escalating mass killings.

Some facts to consider about the gun culture of the United States:

• 123 people die each day due to bullets according to Pew Research.
• Gun violence is the leading cause of death for children under the age of 18 according to CDC.
• The NRA is the #1 lobby group in the U.S. GOP members of Congress receive the lion’s share of the NRA funding.
• There are three times more federally licensed gun dealers than there are Starbucks in the United States.
• According to Pew Research, more guns have not equated to more security. Escalation of gun ownership has made U.S. society less safe. When guns are easy for good people to get, they also become easy for bad people to get.
• After the Clinton Administration banned assault weapons in 1994, mass shooting deaths dropped by 43%. When the ban expired in 2004, mass shooting deaths shot up 239%.
• The United States has just under 5% of the world’s population but owns 35% of civilian handguns which are estimated to be close to 400 million. It’s estimated over 20 million of those guns are AR15 types according to American Gun Facts.
• The AR15 like the U.S. military M16 is a killing machine. Its sole purpose is to destroy a human life. If you want evidence of the destructive power of these weapons, watch CBS 60 Minutes – Why do mass shooters choose the AR-15 style rifle?

“Americans do not understand what these weapons (AR15) do to children’s bodies. They destroy them. That’s not hyperbole.” – John Woodrow Cox

Can you call yourself “pro-life” if you want to ban abortion but don’t want to ban assault rifles that have killed children?

This is what it has come down to:

“Dying in mass shootings is the price of freedom.” – Bill O’Reilly.

Switzerland, Canada, Japan, and over 150 other countries have freedom. They have citizens with mental illnesses. To pin the epidemic of mass shootings in the U.S. on mental illness when Switzerland, Canada, and Japan don’t have mass shootings is illogical and warped thinking.

“It’s impossible to reverse assault weapons in the United States.” – Anonymous

The United States has taken up impossible tasks before. Lewis and Clark didn’t know where they were going when they went exploring for the Northwest passage back in 1803, but they took up the challenge, fortified by courage and faith. It was thought to be impossible to put a man on the moon, but we came together and put a man on the moon in 1969. Could we not come together and do a “moon shot” against our gun culture?

I challenge each of us to look in the mirror and ask what each of us can do. Some suggestions:

Fear and distrust are at the heart of our gun culture. We use the 2nd amendment to hide our fear and distrust. Work on your fear and distrust. Study it. Seek support. Lean into your discomfort. Get out of your comfort zone.

If you own a gun, lock it up and keep it separate from the ammunition. If you know someone who owns a gun, ask them to do the same.

Let’s have some thoughtful conversations. Let’s be curious. Let’s explore. What about gun registration, gun insurance, and testing like we have automobiles?

How about higher taxes on guns and ammunition to help curb gun violence just like what the cigarette tax did for smoking?

When the Civil Rights Act was passed in 1964, it didn’t end racism, but it was a beginning to making the United States a more perfect union. It began to help overcome the darkness …

“For there is always light, if only we’re brave enough to see it, if only we’re brave enough to be it.”                                                                                                                                                   – Amanda Gorman